Friday, July 07, 2006

Breaking the rules

Thank you

It's good to know that I'm not the only one that questions the validity of "The Rules" and thinks some of the principles are dated. Yes, It makes sense on a certain level. I don't think anyone should allow themselves to be taken for granted and it's good to have a sense of independence. However, It can't be "faked". What's the point of lying? It makes dating into a big >game.

Sure, It's good to keep a sense of mystery and not throw everything about yourself on the table at once. But pretending to be someone that you're not so that the guy marries you is ludicrious. Eventually you have to be honest and open.

I know I'm young and the people that wrote that book have a lot more experience than me. I'll just try to strike a balance and do what feels right.

Last night I went out drinking with Carl and his boyfriend. When I got home I saw the light blinking on the answering machine. It was Jonas!

The Rules: "Don't call him back if he leaves a message on your answering machine. You'll appear too eager. Let him enjoy the chase"

(*first rule broken*) I called him back today after my morning shift at the Deli.

It was so nice hearing his voice again. He invited me to go out this weekend.

He said: "My friend from college has a band and they're performing at the ________ on Sunday. Do you want to come?"

The Rules: "Don't even accept a date unless he's given ample notice" (for instance, If he wants to see you on the weekend, he has to call you by Wednesday. If he doesn't, Tell him it's too late and you already have plans.)

(*second rule broken*) I said "yes"

Then he asked me what I was doing tonight. I told him I had to work.

The Rules: "Don't talk on the phone for more than 10 minutes. Use an egg timer. When it goes off make an excuse like you're too busy and hang up."

(*third rule broken*) We talked for 45 minutes. I sat on the windowsill, taking in the afternoon sun and laughing. He has a great sense of humor. I could talk to him for hours.

I feel a lot more confident and happy today. Maybe it was the phone call I just had with Jonas, or maybe it's the warm weather. I just feel like I have things under control for once.

I'm actually thinking of calling Jonas back and telling him that even though I have to work, I could meet him after my shift is over and we can get a drink together. Maybe I shouldn't... Maybe I should just wait until Sunday. I'm torn. I'll take a shower and see how I feel afterwards.

Tonight I'm going to invite Lisa to live with me, if she agrees it will free up so much of my income. I hope this works out.
posted by Iris at 7:45 PM