Sunday, March 20, 2005

Damn

I'm stoned. It's 4/20 after all.

typing is damn near impossible at the moment..

Carl is making margaritas in the kitchen and eating all the food in my fridge. I think he's so stoned that he forgot that I'm sitting here waiting for him to return and talk to me again.
So I thought I would type on my diary to amuse myself..

I had all these thoughts that seemed so deep a few minutes ago..but I can't repeat them because I don't think I can formulate them properly or rather..articulate

articulte..articulate..that's such a strange word

It has art in it and late...art and late..

I wish I was an artist, I would paint pictures all the time, of all my friendas and give them as gifts.. I would have dreams and I would paint them, so vivid..

vivid..that's another strange word

don't you think

say it ten times..

everything feels overwhelming right now, my whole life a huge fucking failure

My rent is due at the end of this month and I wont have a check coming in from my day job because I don't have it anymore..

I looked for jobs today

i really did..

nothing..except telemarketing

Oh god, please don't make telemarketing a last resort for survival.

I could borrow money from my Mom

I might have to do

I HATE MY LIFE RIGHT NOW
posted by Iris at 4:30 AM